A few years ago, I was on a red-eye flight to California, trying to be low-key about the fact that I had just leaked through my pants.
I was wearing black leggings (thank God), but I remember sitting there stiff as a board, praying the guy next to me wouldn’t notice, and wondering why I even agreed to travel in the first place.
I’ve worked in women’s health long enough to know I’m not alone.
Bladder leaks are ridiculously common, especially after kids or once perimenopause starts doing its thing, but no one talks about how hard it can be to do normal stuff like hop on a plane, go on a weekend road trip, or even stay at a hotel without secretly mapping out every bathroom within a 10-foot radius.
I’ve tried just about every trick, tool, and late-night Amazon order. So this isn’t some polished list from a pamphlet.
This is the real-world guide I give to my patients, my sisters, my friends, and the one I use every time I pack a suitcase.
Planes: AKA, the “Please Don’t Turn on the Seatbelt Sign Yet” Zone
There’s a special kind of stress that hits when you need the bathroom right now, but the aisle’s blocked by the drink cart, the seatbelt sign is glowing, and you’re boxed into a window seat next to a dead-asleep stranger.
Here’s what makes flying easier for me, and the women I work with:
1. Always choose the aisle seat
This one’s non-negotiable.
I don’t care if the window seat has a better view, I’d rather have peace of mind.
Being able to slip out without doing the awkward “excuse me” shuffle makes a huge difference.
2. Use the bathroom twice before you board
First when you get to the airport, then again right before boarding.
It sounds excessive, but it works.
Sometimes it’s not about whether you need to go, it’s about knowing you can go.
3. Sip water early, then slow down
Dehydrating yourself backfires.
Your urine becomes more concentrated and irritates your bladder even more.
I usually drink plenty in the morning, then taper off about an hour before boarding.
No coffee, no Diet Coke, both of those make things worse for me.
4. Make a little kit you can grab in a pinch
In my personal bag, I carry:
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A pair of incontinence underwear
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Travel wipes
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Spare leggings
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A small zip bag in case I need to ditch anything quietly
I’ve also started using Bladder Control Patches on longer days, especially if I know bathrooms will be unpredictable.
It’s just a small patch you apply to your lower abdomen.
Plant-based, easy, and it really helps reduce those sudden “I gotta go” signals that sometimes show up uninvited.
I recommended it to a patient last month who was traveling to Europe and nervous about long tour bus rides.
She texted me from Florence:
“I actually forgot about my bladder for once.”
I’ll take that win.
Road Trips: You’re in Control… Kind Of
Driving gives you more freedom to stop when you need to.
That is, unless you’re in the middle of nowhere with zero gas stations or stuck in traffic behind a flipped semi (been there).
1. Schedule your stops like you schedule snacks
Even if I don’t need to go, I stop every 1.5–2 hours.
I treat bathroom breaks like refueling, not optional.
Apps like Flush or SitOrSquat make it easier to plan out stops ahead of time, especially in unfamiliar areas.
2. Keep your supplies within reach
A couple years ago, I made the rookie mistake of stuffing all my underwear and pads in a suitcase… in the trunk.
I now keep a small bag in the glovebox with a change of underwear, wipes, and one of those disposable bed pads, which, by the way, work great as seat liners in case you’re worried about leaks mid-drive.
3. “Timed voiding” isn’t glamorous, but it works
Basically: don’t wait until you’re bursting.
Even if you don’t feel urgency, go on a schedule. It helps train your bladder to get into a rhythm.
One of my clients used to avoid road trips entirely, then started doing this.
Now she drives from Melbourne to her grandkids every other month, and she swears by the every-two-hour rule.
Hotels, Sleepovers & Cruise Cabins: The Nighttime Struggle
If you’ve ever woken up in a hotel bed and realized you leaked, I don’t need to explain the panic.
There’s something about being in someone else’s sheets that makes the stakes feel higher.
1. Ask for a room near a bathroom or elevator
No one needs a midnight hike across the hallway when urgency hits.
I always mention it at check-in.
You don’t need to give a reason, just ask.
It’s a normal accommodation.
2. Taper fluids after dinner
I still drink water (please don’t dehydrate yourself!), but I slow it down in the evening.
No big drinks after 7PM, and I cut out caffeine completely after 3PM.
3. Bring nighttime protection that feels… normal
I’m a big fan of Leak-Proof Underwear, especially for overnight trips.
They don’t feel bulky like some of the store-bought brands I’ve tried, and they wash and dry easily if you’re staying somewhere longer.
I’ve had women tell me it’s the first time they’ve felt “secure but not embarrassed.”
Honestly?
Same.
Also, I always bring a waterproof pad or a folded towel to sleep on.
It’s just one less thing to worry about when your brain’s already running a mile a minute.
My Final Advice (from Someone Who’s Been There)
Bladder leaks are frustrating, but they don’t get to cancel your trip.
You deserve to be in that plane seat, that passenger seat, that Airbnb on the beach.
Preparedness is not paranoia.
It’s self-respect.
I don’t always get it right.
Sometimes I still overthink it.
But more often than not, with a little planning and a bit of kindness toward myself, I get to enjoy the trip instead of stressing the whole time.
And I want that for you, too.
Quick Travel Checklist:
✅ Aisle seat (always)
✅ Bathroom schedule mapped out
✅ Confidence kit (wipes, underwear, spare clothes)
✅ Leak-proof overnight gear
✅ Hydration plan (no caffeine bombs)
✅ Apps for restroom stops
✅ Optional supports (like bladder patches or pelvic tools)
✅ Permission to adjust if things don’t go perfectly
You’re not fragile.
You’re just adapting.
And that’s powerful.
Wherever you're headed — I hope you go with confidence.
– Marielle
Pelvic health practitioner, mom, and woman who always packs extra underwear.
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The 5 Types of Leaks (and Which One You Might Have)